I am curious where the hymen store is? Is it only available online with the penis enlargers?
Respect the Caviar!!!
November 18, 2008 by sixofclubsIrregardless!
November 14, 2008 by sixofclubsApparently Oxford has an excess of funds this year. In addition to adding “bootylicious” to the Oxford English Dictionary (this pains me more than you could know), they have also come up with “The 10 Most Irritating Phrases in the English Language”
Sadly, they didn’t look in their own dictionary, to find bootylicioius and add it to the list, but I do agree with many of them. Their list includes:
1 - At the end of the day
2 - Fairly unique
3 - I personally
4 - At this moment in time
5 - With all due respect
6 - Absolutely
7 - It’s a nightmare
8 - Shouldn’t of
9 - 24/7
10 - It’s not rocket science
Many are annoying, yes… but is this really the top 10? How can “I personally” be there, and “irregardless” and “bootylicious” (Or any word ending in “licious” that doesn’t begin with “de”, “si” or “ma” be excluded? If you read the comments, there are MANY other more annoying phrases, in my opinion.
What are your most hated phrases and / or words in the English language?
What I’ve Learned
November 14, 2008 by sixofclubsA semi-regular post has turned out to be “what I’ve learned”. This week, I learned…
– You can grow out of maternity pants. I kind of expected it though — they were the pants that fit really well when I wasn’t all that big, while other pants had a challenge staying up. Still, kind of depressing to grow out of pants that are supposed to be “fat pants”
– A good stroller is sturdy, folds easily and can be put up or taken down with one hand, while the other arm holds a watermelon that wiggles.
– There are two guarentees to make a baby stop crying — gas-ex type drops and a miracle blanket. I now have both and will put them to the test. I wonder if they work on teenagers?
– There is no real way to actually be prepared for having a kid… no matter how much you try.I am still going to try though. Call me a glutton for punishment.
– If you mess up, but do it with confidence… the kid will never know! (thanks AP)
– There really are infant CPR classes taught in person (although it is amazing how hard they are to find!)
– You can dress a baby girl in “girly” clothes without pink. (Ok… I knew this, but others are beginning to realize it with me.. hee hee hee)
– Having good friends is the best baby gift you could ever hope for.
Tis the Season?
November 13, 2008 by sixofclubsToday is one of the more productive days of my entire year. Not because it is Thursday. Not because it is November 13th. Not even because it is any particular time of the quarter. But this is the day I am supposed to be writing my review.
Like many people, I HATE writing my review. I fully understand it’s value and know that no one is going to write it for me, nor would they show off my accomplishments for the year. But I still hate it.
So I tell myself things like, “I’ll just finish this and that up before I get started.” Then when those things are done, I find other things that just simply “cannot wait another minute”. This is how I get so much done on this day, more than other days of the year.
Do you have this same level of procrastination? Are you actually productive when you are procrastinating? What do you do?
When is it appropriate to start panic mode?
November 10, 2008 by sixofclubs
With 50 days to go, a grand baby shower under my belt and all new realizations being presented with more frequency, I am keeping composure as much as I can, but really am starting to panic.
I look forward to all the really cool stuff and am developing new definitions of what “really cool stuff” means relating to kids. I’ve even come to terms with the not so great stuff, like sleep deprivation and dealing with smelly things coming out of every orifice without warning and the one day of torture (otherwise known as child birth). Well… as much as one can come to terms without ACTUAL experience. I now realize exactly how great all those mommies and daddies out there are. How is it possible to be sane while you worry about everything under the sun? Is it possible to be sane until after your child has one of his/her own? Even then? How can you really prepare?
I’m developing a new theory that having kids is your parents’ personal vendetta being paid back by the karma police. All the worry they have for you, you have for this little thing. All the wonder they had, you now have. All the mistakes they made… you are about to make. And all the bad things you did as a kid are about to be paid back in spades (PLEASE HELP ME!).
Alas, there are 50 days left and I am sure everything will be fine. At least this is what logic tells me. Maybe some day soon I’ll start listening to logic. For now, I am sticking with panic.
Marzipan E-mail?
November 6, 2008 by sixofclubsEmail is a funny thing. You get sent some pretty funny things, pretty amazing things and some things you don’t know what to do with. Today, i got something pretty cool.
According to snopes.com, this has been going around the internet since 2005, saying these babies are made of marzipan. Apparently the images are real, but they are made of polymer clay. I still think they are SOO awesome. OK… maybe it is my maternal hormones talking, but I love them none the less.
If these were made of Marzipan, would you try it?
The End of Election Season… FINALLY!!!
November 6, 2008 by sixofclubsLast night I went home. I took my mail in the house and took off my shoes. I looked at my phone and realized I had NO phone messages!
This was the GREATEST thing I’d seen all day. NO ONE harassed spammed called me ALL day to explain why they needed my vote.
In the previous couple of weeks, we got between 5 - 10 calls PER DAY from some numb skull who wanted to bash the other guy and plead for my vote. It got REALLY annoying!! I realize I am a citizen of a battle ground state, but we (maybe even especially we) are tired of election fighting and already made up our minds… leave us alone!!! Alas, they didn’t. Even at 5:00 (two hours before polls closed and several hours after I voted) I got one last call, urging me to vote.
But now it is over. THANK GOD! I will be able to enjoy the stupid jingles from commercials actually selling something. I will be able to enjoy the lack of people calling me to tattle on someone else. This is why people have kids?? it doesn’t need to be done by adults!
My rant is now over along with the Election.
Election Day 2008
November 4, 2008 by sixofclubsThanks to Snarky for the find — I may be a copycat, but I am calling it flattery 
GO VOTE! (Even if you vote for the wrong person, at least you earn your right to complain for the next four years.)
75 Is a BIG Number
October 30, 2008 by sixofclubsI have many things to write about, but not enough time to write about them. I will, in due time.
For now, I bring you baby updates.
– She is still doing well and is more active than ever. I think she is practicing for the Hokey Pokey world tour.
– She is 4 pounds 10 ounces! (as a reminder, I am 31 weeks… this is 75th percentile range… EEK!)
– The 75th percentile apparently translates into a baby who is over 9 pounds. NINE pounds! First and foremost, I want a healthy baby. But if you can help visualize a small baby, that would be awesome. Small head. Small shoulders. All good. Thanks!
– At last week’s appointment, she was breach. Because we are getting to the end, there is less room to move around. As of today, she has her head down (where it “should” be). I am hoping it stays that way. If you can help visualize her staying there, that would also be awesome.
– Today was her latest sonogram. The picture isn’t as good as it has been, but here it is. In motion, I could see her suckling, which was SOOO awesome. According to the doc, all is well. She has a big brain and everything growing as it should.
I can’t wait to meet her!
NEAR!!! FAR!!!!
October 11, 2008 by sixofclubs
It is all AP’s fault.
